Honey, I Shrunk the Slayer
by See Jane Write
Summary: The Nerd Herd accidentally shrinks the Scooby Gang. Completed now. Yay on me.
1. Chapter One

Honey I Shrunk the Slayer  
  
Disclaimer: The names and places might seem familiar. That's 'cause they are. Joss made them up! In his head! Using his brain!  
  
Chapter One  
  
Warren Mears looked up at his latest machine. The freeze ray didn't do so well, and neither did the invisibility ray thing. But this one, he was sure that it would work. It was small, but very technological, all these wires going around it to various places, each of the five red buttons doing a different thing and even more if someone decided to move the lever on the side of the machine.  
"Wow," Jonathan Levinson said in amazement. "What is it?" he asked, frowning at it. He looked more closely at the machine, trying to see if he could guess what it was.  
Andrew Wells walked over and stood next to Warren. "What's it do?" he asked as he sat down in a chair beside Warren, spinning it around in a circle with his feet up, laughing like a little child.  
"You'll see," Warren told the other members of the Trio. He smiled his "evil smile", laughing hysterically.  
  
Buffy Summers looked out the window. Seeing that it was dark outside, she frowned, turning to the other Scoobies. "I guess I'll go patrolling. There's this thing out there," she said frowning again. "Definitely non-vampire." She looked anxiously at the Scoobies. "You guys coming?" she asked eagerly.  
Willow Rosenberg and Tara Maclay looked at each other. "Sure," Willow said. Tara nodded and the two Wiccans got up to get some stakes.  
Buffy smiled, grateful for the company. "Great. Anyone else?"  
Dawn Summers stood up quickly. "Ooh! Me! Me! Pick me! I wanna come! Pick me!" She started bouncing with excitement.  
Buffy looked sternly at her younger sister. "No!" Dawn frowned in disappointment. "You're too young."  
"Don't you have homework?" Willow asked, coming to Buffy's rescue.  
Dawn groaned. "Math. *Still* seemed cooler when we were singing about it." She sat down on the couch waiting for the Scoobies to leave.  
"We'll come," Xander Harris announced, placing his arm around Anya's shoulder. "I'll even bring snacks!" He and Anya stood up and went into Buffy's kitchen. "Doritos or Cheese Curls?" Xander called out into the living room.  
"Doritos!" Willow yelled back quickly as a smile overtook her face.  
"Ok!" Xander said, coming back out with the bag of Doritos in his hands.  
"Great!" Buffy said, opening the front door. "We better get going." She turned to Dawn. "Ok, finish dinner, homework, and don't stay up too late, k?"  
Dawn sighed. "Ok."  
"Great," Buffy said, walking out the door. "See ya later." With that all the Scoobies followed her out the door and on their way over to Restfield Cemetery.  
  
"Someone take this," Warren said quietly so the Slayer would not hear him, crouching down behind a rather large tombstone. He held up his little machine that he made.  
"Not me!" Jonathan argued. "They're too tall."  
"Alright," Andrew said with a sigh. "I will." He smiled. "Dude, this is *so* cool."  
"Shh!" Warren commanded. "They'll hear you!" he added, pointing at the approaching Scooby Gang. *~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
"Did you hear that?" Tara asked, looking around her to see if there was anything in the shadows following them.  
"Hear what, baby?" Willow asked, turning to look at Tara. The two witches ran up to Buffy.  
"I-I thought I heard something," Tara said quietly. She paused for a second. "Maybe not."  
"Oh," Buffy said. She pointed back at Anya and Xander eating Doritos. "Probably just them," she pointed out.  
Willow smiled, putting another Dorito in her mouth. "Or me!" she said.  
"Oh look," Buffy said, her eyes focused on something behind Tara's head. "Vampires," she said. "Fun."  
Willow looked around. "Uh, not vampires," she said, looking more closely at the three men walking up to them. "More like Warren, Jonathan, and the other one," she said, sighing.  
"Oh, them," Buffy sighed, putting her stake into her coat pocket.  
Xander caught up with the rest of them, Anya right behind him. "What have we got?" he asked. He looked down at the bag in his hands. "Besides an empty bag of Doritos."  
Anya looked up at Xander. "Full stomachs?" she suggested helpfully. "Uh, messy hands?" She frowned.  
Buffy glared at the two of them. "No, we have nerds," she said.  
"Nerds?!" Xander asked. "I like nerds! They're tasty."  
"No, I mean the Evil Nerd Herd!" Buffy told them. "Y'know, Warren, Jonathan, and uh Whatshisname."  
Andrew walked over to them, the machine in his hands. "My name's Andrew," he said with a sigh. "I am evil!"  
Buffy rolled her eyes before glancing down to look at the machine. "Wait," she asked, "what does that do?"  
Andrew smiled, pushing the button. "You'll find out soon enough," he told them as a green light came out and hit the Scooby Gang, knocking the five of them onto the ground.  
  
"'You're too young'," Dawn muttered bitterly. She made a face and looked up from Buffy's dresser. "Too young my ass," she muttered. She grabbed the stake and cross and headed down the stairs. She opened the door and walked out onto Revello Drive.  
She began walking down the road, seeing no trouble. "I can handle myself," she said to herself. "I could go patrolling. Buffy and them did it all the time when they were my age. It's just not fair. I could save the world if someone handed me superpowers and stuff." She continued walking. "It's *so* unfair," she muttered.  
"What's unfair, Nibblet?" Spike asked, approaching her from behind the bushes next to the Summers house.  
Dawn groaned. "Buffy won't let me patrol," she said. She began swinging her stake around. "I can do it if she'd let me," Dawn added.  
"Well, well then," Spike said, walking down towards the cemetery. "Looks like you've got yourself a bit of a problem." He shrugged, tossing his cigarette down on the ground as he began walking to the empty street. "I can find 'em for yu, if you want."  
"Sure," Dawn agreed as she began following the vampire.  
Dawn glared at him and walked down to the cemetery, looking for the Scoobies. "Uh, Spike, are you sure they're here?" she asked the vampire a few minutes later.  
Spike shrugged. "Yea," he added. "Five of them, bag of Doritos," he said.  
"That's them," Dawn sighed.  
"Cemetery," Spike declared.  
Dawn nodded and walked through the cemetery. She didn't see anything. She walked around some more, finding the bag of Doritos on the ground. "Well, they must have went home," she muttered before heading back to the house.  
  
"Did it work?" Jonathan asked. After going back to their "lair", the Evil Nerd Herd was discussing their latest bit of work during the commercial breaks of Enterprise.  
Andrew smiled. "Can I say, 'Honey I shrunk the Slayer'?" The three of them laughed. 


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

Disclaimer: Do I need to mention again that these are not my characters? I think you would get the message. One would hope so. These characters are Joss's and I am only borrowing them. But if he wanted to give me the rights to them, along with all the money...:sighs:

Buffy looked around her, only to find the tombstone she had been standing next to was a whole lot bigger than before. Either that or she was a whole lot smaller. She frowned, wondering if Giles knew anything about the Hellmouth causing tombstones to grow with age or something like that. He probably did, since he is Giles, after all, but still.

She looked around her again. From beside her, Willow stood up, rubbing her head lightly as she did so. "Oh my goddess!" Willow exclaimed loudly, looking up at the tombstone. She groaned and began to shake Tara awake, while Buffy tried her best at to waking up Xander, with little success.

"What?" Xander muttered sleepily, sitting up straight and rubbing his head. "What's going on? When do we eat? He looked around where he was once more, shocked to find that it wasn't his and Anya's bedroom.

Willow turned around, glaring at Xander. "This is serious, Xand. I said 'Oh my goddess'," she reminded him, sounding a little annoyed.

Xander frowned. "You always say that," he pointed out, while shaking Anya awake gently, hoping that she would actually wake up.

"Well, it's always important," Willow commented. She sighed, taking in a deep breath before continuing. "Xander, look at how tall you are," she commanded him in a gentle tone, gesturing at their surroundings.

Buffy looked at her height again. She knew that she had always been on the small side, but this was just ridiculous. "Now what?" she asked, sounding a little bit worried. "I don't think we'll be going anywhere soon," she pointed out.

Willow frowned. "I have no idea," she told Buffy honestly. "I mean, Buffy, come on- look at how small we are!" she yelled out, her left arm gesturing at the very large tombstone in front of them.

Buffy frowned once more. "Well, looking on the bright side, if any mini-vamps were ever to come, we could slay them" she began. "Oh god, what are we going to do?"

Tara awoke with a small yawn, rubbing her eyes as she glanced around. "Where-" she began to ask before Willow answered.

"We're in the cemetery and we're five inches tall. We don't know how we got like this, or what to do, and I can guarantee that we are going to die like this because we just are" Willow rambled in one breath.

"No one's dying," Buffy began. "Not on my watch. We'll find a way to solve this, we always do," she went on as she began picking up little tiny sticks to use as stakes, just in case those little vampires would ever come. "Now we're going to use these as"

Before the Slayer could finish her statement the Earth around them began shaking heavily as the five Scoobies found themselves being tosses into the air a little, an event that eventually awoke Anya with a scream.

"What's going on?" the ex-demon asked, her voice filled with fear and anxiety as she clung to Xander.

"I'm not sure," Buffy replied before catching site of the thing causing the booming. A large black boot that she knew was familiar. "Spike," she muttered angrily before her face lit up. "SPIKE!" she hollered at the top of her lungs. "SPIKE!" she screamed once more as she motioned for the other Scoobies to do the same.

"SPIKE!" came the yell from all five micro-Scoobies.

The leather-clad vampire walked along the lonely depths contained within Restfield Cemetery. Buffy still was out patrolling when he had walked Dawn back home. Not that he actually expected Buffy to be home and grateful that he had protected the former Key from any harm. But it would have been nice.

_"Oh Spike!" she would say right before she would leap up into his open arms and start kissing him like there was no tomorrow. "How can I ever repay you?" she would then ask him. "I'll do anything!" she would continue in a very sexy voice._

_ "Anything?" he would then ask, raising a testing eyebrow down at her._

"Of course! You saved us," she would continue with the same amount of seduction. "You're the big hero" 

"SPIKE!"

The bleached blonde vampire stopped short, swearing that he had something. It sounded like yelling, but the noise was very faint. Perhaps it was another part of his fantasy in which other people would be cheering him on.

"SPIKE!"

Or not.

He looked around, knowing that he had definitely heard something, although he was unsure what exactly it was. But it was definitely calling out to him. "Yes?" he answered warily as he continued his search for the source of the mystery voice, or possibly voices.

"DOWN HERE!" the yelling spoke as Spike felt something poking him near his ankle, telling him where exactly 'down here' was. Nothing he had ever seen within his one hundred plus years of living and unliving could prepare him for the sight. "Bloody hell," he began as he dropped his hand to the ground. "Slayer, is that you?"

The five inch figure that resembled Buffy walked up onto his hand, along with midget versions of Willow, Tara, Xander, and Anya. Spike let out a small chuckle, as their tiny feet were tickling him slightly. "Alright," he began slowly. "Does one of you want to ell me what the bloody hell is going on here?"

"What's it look like happened?" Anya asked, her hands placed firmly on her small waist. "We've been shrunken."

Spike sighed. "Yes, I see that. By who?"

"Those three little trouble-causing nerds," Buffy groaned. "Warren, Jonathan, and, uh, the other one. They had something, a machine thingy."

Willow nodded enthusiastically. "They hit us with it right before we shrunk."

"Spike, you have to help us," Xander added.

Spike chuckled slightly again. "And why would I do that?" he asked before he caught Buffy's gaze. The look that told him she would be in his debt to do whatever he wanted if he helped. A wicked smile crosses the vampire's lips. "Alright, I'll help."

"We need to get somewhere safe," Tara pointed out. "Where would we stay? I mean we'd get lost on any bed. If we fell, it could be enough of a height to kill us."

Willow closed her eyes as she mentally tried to picture hers and Tara's room. Next to the enormous bed laidÉWillow smiled. "I think I have a place. Amy left her cage when she"

"Willow!" Anya yelled, clearly outraged at the thought. "Do you honestly expect me to stay in a rat cage? It's probably full of Amy poop!"

"Cleaning up rat poop was not part of the deal!" Spike added with a frown. "Is there anything else that can contain the five of you?"

Tara nodded. "Th-there's an empty jewelry box up in our room. I think it belonged t-to Mrs. Summers."

"The black octangular one?" Buffy asked curiously with a smile.

Tara nodded slightly. "Yes," she confirmed a minute later.

"Would we all fit in a jewelry box?" Xander asked curiously. Not that he was one to know a lot about jewelry containers, but the ones Anya had were very small and could probably only hold two of them side by side, possibly three if it was Anya, Willow, and Buffy, which would never be happening as his girlfriend and best friend still could not get along as well.

Buffy nodded. "Yea, this one's pretty big. Three of us could sleep in the bottom where her necklaces used to be and the other two could sleep up top where she held her earrings."

"Xander and I will be on top!" Anya volunteered with a smile as she wrapped her arm around Xander. "Actually, Xander will be on top and I will be directly--"

"Anya!" Xander yelled loudly, cutting off the ex-demon's prattling about her sex fantasies. "We've talked about this. Private conversations are less private when they're in front of my friends."

Anya frowned as she folded her arms across her chest. "You don't have to be all mean. I can be on top if you want"

"Not what I meant," Xander said through clenched teeth as he turned to Buffy, Willow, and Tara, hoping that one of them could say something getting them off the subject of sex all together.

Buffy smiled slightly before turning back to face Spike. "So can you take us back home now?" she asked.

Spike sighed. "I suppose so," he began. "As long as I don't have to listen to what the Bloody Poof does in bed."

"Anya?" Willow asked warily as she turned to face the ex-demon.

"I'll be quiet," Anya promised as she sat down on Spike's hand.

"Good," Spike said flatly as he began walking them home, hoping that Dawn would already be asleep so he would not have to explain the Scoobies' shortness.

"It's here!" Andrew yelled excitedly as he ran down to the basement, a small brown box clutched tightly in his hands.

"No way!" Jonathan exclaimed as he tried to reach for it. "Hey, give it! It's as much mine as it is yours!"

"Hey, hey, hey, "Warren called out as he approached the two quarreling members of the Trio. "What's all the commotion about? I'm trying to fix up the freeze ray."

"It's here!" Andrew blurted out again, the excitement in his voice escalating.

"Do you mean to tell me that the entire first season of Dr. Who is contained inside that very box?" Warren asked. "And it arrived on the night we shrunk the Slayer?" He smiled wickedly. "This has got to be the best day ever!"

"Better than the day when there was that all day Star Trek marathon on the Sci Fi channel?" Jonathan asked.

"Hmm, good point," Warren noted. "But now that the Slayer is out of the way, we can begin phase two of our plan." He smiled wickedly again and began to laugh, the others joining in.

"Right after we watch Doctor Who," Andrew added before the evil laughter continued.


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to Joss. Except for my lack of sanity. That is blamed on the bunnies. (No, Lauren, I'm not leaving them alone! They stole my sanity! Them and the penguins...)

Spike sighed heavily as he walked down the road that would lead him to Warren's house, the basis of the Nerd operations. As he found the house he banged on the door hardly before just giving it up and kicking it down. The three little boys on the other side were not about to tell him not to do something like that.

"Can we help you?" Jonathan asked as Andrew's eyes went wide and he whispered, "Dude, that was so cool."

Spike looked curiously over at the blond boy before answering Jonathan's question. "Heard you shrunk the Slayer," he stated clearly as he looked around Nerd Central.

Andrew nodded. "Yea, we did!" he yelled excitedly. "And we got _Doctor Who_ on DVD. Well, the first season anyway. It was the second best day ever, the first being the all-day-all-night _Star Trek_ marathon."

"That was pretty cool," added Jonathan with a smile. "We were all dressed up like--"

"Do I care?" Spike asked irritably, cutting off the little man. "I came for information about the Slayer and I expect to get that information."

"Like what information?" Warren asked as he turned around to face Spike. "You said you already heard about her, uh, height problem," he said, chuckling slightly along with Jonathan and Andrew.

"Not funny," Spike said as he rolled his eyes. "Look, what is going to happen as a result of this?"

"Listen up," Warren said as he swallowed hard. "You're in our debt so we're not telling you jack. Let yourself out already so we can go back to these episodes and our evil plans!"

"Evil plans?" Spike asked doubtfully.

Warren said nothing, just reached for the broken freeze ray. Luckily it looked like it worked and it was enough to coax Spike out the door. Warren smiled as the Trio returned to the ever-important _Doctor Who_.

Dawn arose early the next morning to the incessant drone coming from the small red alarm clock on her wooden night table. _Odd,_ she thought to herself. _That's Buffy's clock._ Dawn's expression fell into a frown. _What's going on here?_

On her way out to the bathroom, Dawn stopped and poked her head inside Buffy's room. The bed was perfectly made, not a single pillow out of place. _So Buffy was out all night_, Dawn concluded with a heavy sigh. She knew the slaying thing was very important, but she wondered who it would honestly hurt if Buffy decided to spend a little time with her sister.

She stopped once again, peeking inside Willow and Tara's room, finding it equally as clean and tidy as Buffy's had been. Except for the black, eight-sided, open jewelry box on the dresser, right next to Willow's green hairbrush.

Dawn smiled slightly, wondering if Willow or Tara had any good jewelry that she could steal. It was not as if she meant to keep stealing things. Anya's earrings, the lipsticks from various storesÉShe had not meant to do any of those things, but she just wanted them so badly.

"Maybe for the new year I won't do it anymore," she muttered quietly before walking over to see if there was a good necklace in there perhaps.

What she found inside was far from good jewelry. "Um, what the hell?" Dawn sputtered out in obvious confusion.

The sound of her younger sister's voice awoke Buffy with a jump from her position next to Willow. "Dawn, my god, you scared me," Buffy said as she sat up on the bottom of the box.

"What's going on?" the fifteen year old asked.

"What does it look like is going on?" Anya asked irritably. She was obviously in a bad mood, most likely as a result of the three other female Scoobies forbidding her to have sex with Xander the previous night.

"What Anya is trying to say is that the Nerd Herd shrunk us last night with their latest machine," Tara said calmly from the other side of Willow.

"Spike took us home," Buffy added sheepishly, feeling slightly embarrassed about the whole concept of being five inches tall and needing help home from the vampire she hated.

"And you haven't tried to do anything to reverse the effects?" Dawn asked with a shocked look on her face.

"Dawn, by the time we realized we were short, got help, and then got home it was close to three in the morning," Buffy pointed out with a frown. "We were all tired."

Dawn's youthful face quickly lit up with excitement. "I could stay home from school and try to figure things out!" she offered eagerly.

"Nice try," Buffy said as her sister's face fell. "School is important," she added. "It's where you learn and where we will send you to keep social services off our backs," she began, her voice telling Dawn that she meant business and now was not the time for Dawn to push it.

"Right," Dawn began. "Only one problem."

"What?" Buffy asked with a sigh.

"Um, it's a little far to walk in the time I have and you're all not able to drive"

"Oh, right," Buffy said, frowning as she bit against her lower lip. "Um, ask Janice to take you, I guess."

Dawn sighed, rolling her eyes as she walked over to the phone, holding it for a second before she began to dial the number she knew by heart.

"But don't tell her what really happened to me!" Buffy began.

Dawn rolled her eyes. "I'm not stupid," she said with a sigh as she began to talk. "Hello, Janice?...Hey, it's Dawn. Listen, I meant to call you last night, but we got home late from the hospital...No, we're ok...It's just, last night Buffy's friend Willow fell down the stairs and broke her leg and their friend Xander overslept. They were my main ride to school and now I don't have a ride." She smiled slightly as she heard Janice talking to her mother, relieved that her lie had worked. "Oh, you can! That's great, thank you!...Alright, see you in a bit."

A triumphant smile present on her face, Dawn walked back over to the dresser. "Janice's mom will take me. I better start getting ready."

"Please eat something!" Buffy begged.

Dawn rolled her eyes again. "Alright, alright," she promised as she walked out of the room and began getting ready. "I think we still have pop tarts or frozen waffles," she said, mostly to herself as she walked back into the bathroom.

"How are we going to make it through this?" Buffy asked once Dawn had left the room. "Anywhere we might try to go could kill us."

"We can't just sit around here doing nothing," Willow pointed out. "Dawn is right though. We have to find something that might reverse the effects."

"But what?" Xander called down to them. "And how, given the fact that we are trapped inside a jewelry box?"

"That may be," Buffy began as she looked around her. She knew she had told Spike to empty the entire thing, but maybe he had gotten lazy. He does that on occasion. For the most part, she found it to be annoying, but this time it might be for the best. "Bingo!" she yelled happily, retrieving one of Joyce's necklaces that had been shoved into one of the corners.

Willow looked over at Buffy curiously. "What bingo?" she asked before catching site of the necklace.

Anya and Xander both peered over the top of the earring container. "Oh no," Anya mumbled as she caught site of the necklace. "You don't expect us to Tarzan our way out of this, do you?" she asked with a heavy sigh.

Buffy smiled slightly. "Why not?" she asked curiously. She frowned. "Do you have a better idea?" she asked. "An idea that does not include you having sex with Xander?" she added immediately.

Anya shook her head slightly. "There has to be something else. Something more sane."

"It might not be the safest way out, but it's our only shot. If we don't get out, we'll never be our normal selves again."

Anya's eyes suddenly grew wide with fear. "Oh no," she whispered, mainly to herself but as he was standing right next to her, Xander was able to hear what she had to say.

"Honey, are you afraid of heights?" Xander asked curiously as he wrapped a comforting arm around his fiancée. "It'll be ok. I'll go with you and you'll be fine."

Anya shook her head. "That's not what I meant by 'oh no'," she said. "The height doesn't bother me. The fact that I could die if I fall off this bed kinda does, but not the height."

"What did you mean?" Buffy asked curiously as she looked up over at Anya.

Anya swallowed hard. "I was just thinking about the last machine the nerd herd had used against us. With the whole pudding thing."

Xander nodded. "It was gross, but honey, that's been taken care of."

"I don't think that's what she meant Xander," Willow pointed out, the fear in her voice matching the fear on Anya's face. "Whatever caused that might also be in this machine. We could be turning into, well, pudding."

"I d-don't feel pudding-y," Tara began.

Buffy shook her head. "You don't. Someone else feels you and you feel pudding-y to them. You on your own feel perfectly normal. Or, y'know, as normal as someone in your position could feel."

"Anya doesn't feel like pudding," Xander called down after hugging his fiancée tightly.

"Good," Buffy said as she picked up the necklace. "Xander, catch!" she called out as she threw the necklace up.

"Can we start phase two?" Andrew asked as he took the _Doctor Who_ DVD out of their DVD player and placed it back into its case.

"What is phase two exactly?" Jonathan asked as he plopped back down in the beanbag chair.

Warren smiled wickedly. "Summoning in a lot of demons to take over the town."


	4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four

Disclaimer: The characters, places, and mythology contained here did not come from Emma, but rather from Joss Whedon. He, along with Mutant Enemy and Twentieth Century Fox, own all the legal rights to this stuff

"We're going to bring demons to Sunnydale?" Jonathan asked in fear. "I thought we wanted to rule the town."

"Yea, it was in our original pack when we banded together!" Andrew protested. "I don't want a bunch of demons running our town! This is supposed to be for us!"

Warren nodded. "You two are right, for once," he murmured to himself. "What we need is a way to get the Slayer to us so we can kill her."

Jonathan's eyes widened. "No way, we're not killing anyone! Not Buffy!"

"She would do the same once she found us and was returned to her usual lack of height," Warren snapped.

"He's right!" Andrew added. "We can be super villains without killing people! We could just play with cool things."

Warren made a dismissive sound as he looked in shock at Jonathan and Andrew. "We can play with cool things too, but Buffy is the one thing preventing us from ruling Sunnydale."

"She can't exactly rule it now though," Jonathan argued. "She's only five inches tall."

"B-but if we kill Buffy, then who's going to control all the demons and vampires to make sure they don't rule Sunnydale?" Andrew reminded Warren.

Warren nodded as he smiled wickedly as he began searching frantically through his old files. "I think I may have an idea," he said with a smile.

"Do you really think it'll work?" Jonathan asked as he saw Warren pull files out of the cabinet. "I mean, some demons know we shrunk her."

Warren smiled. "Oh, I know this one will work," he began. His statement was soon followed by his trademarked "evil laugh of victory".

Dawn smiled quickly with a laugh as she opened the door to her house. "Home sweet home," she announced as she opened the door wider, allowing her friends and some other people from school to enter the house.

"Your sister's really out of town?" one of the guys from her history class asked curiously.

Dawn nodded. "Everyone's out of town except me. Some business thing."

"Awesome," the guy said as he walked further in and headed for the fridge. "Dawn, you are aware that there's no soda in there, right?" he asked.

"That's 'cause all the soda's out here, dumbass," Janice said as she carried in two large bags filled with soda cans.

"Now we can party," the guy announced as he walked over and grabbed a soda.

"That was the idea," Dawn said with a smile. "Just don't go into my mom's old room. The women living there leave things all over the place."

"Do you hear that?" Buffy asked, listening closely as she put her tiny head to the floor.

Willow nodded. "Sounds kinda like Nerf Herder," she pointed out.

"And that only happens when Dawn's having a party," Buffy added. "Oh she is so grounded!" She frowned. "As soon as we can get downstairs to end the party."

"Buffy, it's taken all day just to get down from the jewelry box," Xander pointed out. "I don't think we'll make it down to end the party.

"No, but we can try," Buffy said as she headed for the door.

"She's beautiful," Jonathan announced.

"I can't believe we got her up in only a few hours. Last time I made her it took days," Warren said in amazement.

"And she works, right?" Jonathan asked curiously.

Warren nodded. "She'll be the perfect decoy."

"But more than that, right?" Jonathan asked again. "I mean, she was built the original way you built her, right?"

Warren nodded. "Yes indeed she was. She stops the demons and we get all the sex."

The three of them smiled as they looked at their ingenious creation: The Buffybot.


	5. Chapter Five

Chapter Five

Disclaimer: As much as I would love all the fame and money from creating these characters, they unfortunately are not mine and are property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Twentieth Century Fox, Kazui Enterprises, Sandollar Television etc

"I just can't believe we got her working," Jonathan said in awe as he looked the robot up and down. "She has the same, um, physical attributes as the original Buffybot, right?" he asked.

Warren nodded. "She's exactly like the original except for the fact that instead of being obsessed with Spike, she's obsessed with us."

"Dude, that is cool," Andrew said with wide eyes. "Who gets to try her out first?"

"I do!" Jonathan and Warren exclaimed at the same time.

"Hey, that's not fair!" Jonathan argued. "You always get to play with the new things first."

Warren sighed. "But I designed her. I have to make sure she works properly," he began as he began leading the robot towards the bedroom.

"We all made her this time!" Jonathan argued back.

"Back off, Frodo, you'll get a turn," Warren shot out. "Just as soon as I know she works."

"Butt munch," Jonathan mumbled as he walked back over to Andrew on the couch.

Andrew smiled as he reached for the controls to the play station they had. "Wanna play something against me?" he asked curiously.

Jonathan grumbled a few incoherent words as Warren and the robot closed the door to the bedroom. "Sure, and I'm going to kick your butt!" Jonathan finally agreed.

Night soon fell over the tiny town of Sunnydale. This would be when Spike made his move. Certainly Buffy would never ask for his help, but did that ever mean she did not need it? Of course not. Spike grumbled as he once again walked up to Nerd Central, storming through the door as if he owned the place.

"Spike," came the greeting from the ever to perky Buffy which Spike immediately recognized as the Buffybot, rebuilt or something since the original was lying in a lot of pieces at the Sunnydale Dump, or at least that was what he was told.

"Don't you start with my washboard abs," Spike mumbled as he walked passed the robot in search of Warren.

Buffybot shook her head. "You do not have washboard abs. But Warren does and I admire them very much," she said with a smile.

"Spike," Warren said as he noticed the vampire's presence. "What can we do for you?" he added.

"You can, uh, reverse whatever it is you did to Buffy and her friends," Spike said clearly as he scanned the room for anything valuable to a nerd.

"Wh-what makes you certain we're going to do that?" Warren asked.

Spike smiled wickedly, the small Bobba Fett he had used against the nerds once again becoming present. "Well, if you do that then Mr. Fett here will get to keep his head," Spike threatened as he placed the action figure in between his thumb and forefinger.

"Well, here we are," Willow said exhaustedly as the Scoobies reached the small table where Dawn was playing her music cds as loud as she could. She turned around and extended her hand to Buffy who was still struggling to get up. "There you go."

Buffy smiled gratefully at Willow. "So now what?" she asked curiously. "Do we break up the party?"

Xander shrugged slightly as he looked around at all the teenagers in the room. All of which seemed to be enjoying whichever artist's cd Dawn had decided to play. "We could do that," he began as he switched the cd player off and began playing love songs from the radio. "Or we could have fun with them."

Buffy smiled as she saw everyone's mouth drop. "Fun is good," she stated with a slightly wicked smile.


	6. Chapter Six

Disclaimer: One day I'll be rich enough to buy the legal rights to these characters and whatnot from Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, etc...But until that day I'll just have to settle for doing this (while trying just to gather the forty-some dollars it'll take to buy season four of _Angel_ when it comes out in two and half weeks--September 7 for anyone who wants to know but doesn't...)

Chapter Six

"Dude, Dawn, what's up with this?" one of the party guests asked as the love songs began bursting through the radio.

Dawn's face turned a bright shade of red in her embarrassment as she quickly rushed to the cd player. "Um, the wiring in this house is really crappy...Keeps the mortgage down, so I can't complain, but still..." she lied as she knelt down next to the small red cd players.

Gasping, she suddenly found the true reason as to why the music had suddenly switched. On the table with the cd player sat her sister, Xander, and Anya while Willow and Tara had begun dancing around in small circles to the music. "What are you doing?" Dawn hissed as she picked up all five Scoobies in her right hand, thanking whatever that they were getting smaller as the time went on.

"Me?" Buffy asked as she tried to sound tough, but knew it was hopeless since she was only a few precious inches tall. "I'm not the one throwing a huge party while my guardian is unavailable."

Dawn groaned as she walked out and into the bathroom after switching the music pack to the alternative rock cd that had been playing before. "Like hell Buffy. This hardly qualified as a party. There's not even a band like there was at your welcome home party a few years ago."

Willow stepped in for Buffy's sake. "But that wasn't Buffy's fault. We invited the band and the guests. But that doesn't count 'cause your mother was home during the party and aware of it before people started showing up."

"Dawn, send your friends home and then clean up," Buffy commanded sternly.

Dawn shook her head as she placed the five Scoobies down next to the sink. "I don't think so," she said clearly.

"Dawn!" Buffy threatened.

"What are you going to do about it?" Dawn asked as she flicked the light off and ran out of the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

"Crap," Buffy muttered to herself. "Ok, we're in big trouble," she began. "Can anyone see anything?" she asked a moment later as she found that she was struggling with the task.

Various ways of saying "no" echoed through the bathroom, followed by a short shriek and then another one as Anya and Xander slipped into the sink.

"Willow?" Buffy called as she forced herself to remain still. "Willow, Tara were are you two?"

"Um, near the soap," Willow answered as she held Tara's left hand comfortingly in her in her right one. "What about you?"

Buffy felt around her, trying to feel anything familiar to her. "Near Dawn's hairbrush," she called a moment later as she clung to the small thing.

"I wish we could see," Xander began softly from in the sink, where Anya was clinging to him. He wrapped a comforting arm around her thin body as to try and calm her down.

To his surprise a second later, the light did flip on and in walked one of the boys from the party.

"Oh, I do not want to see this," Buffy muttered as she turned around and ran into the bristles of Dawn's hairbrush. She looked over at Willow and Tara, finding the two of them had their eyes clenched shut. She could not see into the sink from her position, but she was fairly certain Anya and Xander were not watching as the boy began to use the bathroom facilities.

"You really do not want to mess with the Fett," Warren began as he reached for the action figure.

"I don't?" Spike asked as he examined the plastic thing held in his hands, holding it a little above his head, just out of Warren's reach.

"Look, we'll do...anything. You want the shrink ray plans? Consider them yours. I can reprogram the robot to like you again and you can take her...Just don't mess with Bobba Fett," Warren continued.

"While those do sound tempting, I'm passing," he said as he began to juggle the action figure back and forth between his hands as the three nerds watched in horror.

"Why?" Jonathan asked curiously.

"'Cause I can sleep with the real Slayer and the plans to the shrink ray won't help one bit 'cause I don't speak loser," Spike said as he pretended to nearly drop the action figure, catching it with a few inches to spare.

"We'll bring them back to normal height!" Warren begged.

"Do it," Spike commanded.

"Will we get it back?" Andrew asked.

"Will you do it?" Spike asked back as he continued juggling.

Warren nodded as he pulled Jonathan and Andrew closer towards him. "Look, he's serious so we better do this." The other two nerds instantly agreed as the three of them began fiddling with the shrink ray.

"Here," Warren said ten minutes later as he handed it to Spike. "Just push the red button and it'll undo everything."

Spike glanced curiously at the three of them before shrugging and pushing the large red button on the top. A bright green light filled the room as the three nerds shrunk down to inches.

"Other red button," Mini-Warren mumbled.

Spike gave a slight chuckle before hitting the correct button. A blue light filled the nerd's basement as they returned to normal height.

The same blue light filled the Summers' downstairs bathroom as the Scoobies reverted to their normal height. Luckily for them, the boy had left and lucky for Anya and Xander, he had not tried to wash his hands.

Buffy groaned, pulling Dawn's hairbrush out of her honey blond hair and tossing it to the ground. "Hey," she said in realization. "I'm me again."

"Very good," Xander said proudly as he patted Buffy's head slightly.

"Watch it," Buffy warned. "I'm not the one who looks like I wet myself," she said as she gestured down at where the water from the sink had gotten to Xander's pants.

"Not my fault," Xander began as he opened the bathroom door and the five of them got out.

Buffy smiled as she walked back into the family room, switching off the cd player and snapping the attention of everyone in the room.

"Dawn, I thought you said your sister was on a business trip," the boy who had used the bathroom said as he turned to Dawn.

"Please," Buffy began. "I don't even have a job, but you better go and wash your hands," she said. The boy said nothing as his cheeks grew red and he rushed over to the bathroom. "Now Dawn, send your friends home and clean up this mess," she commanded slightly.

Embarrassment covered Dawn's face as Buffy began walking up the stairs. "Um, well, I guess the party's over," she began weakly.

FIN


End file.
